Chapter 37

Golden sunlight spills across my face, pulling me from sleep. For a disoriented moment, I don't recognize my own bedroom. Then the weight of Daniel's arm draped possessively over my waist brings everything crashing back.

My pulse skyrockets. I can't let him wake up now. Not when I'm this close to hyperventilating. Not when my thoughts are this tangled. Moving with glacial slowness, I slip from beneath the covers.

He shifts, mumbling something unintelligible, but remains asleep. I exhale shakily while pulling on yesterday's discarded clothes and retrieving my phone from the nightstand.

The bedroom door creaks like a betrayal when I open it. I freeze, blood roaring in my ears. Glancing back, I find Daniel still sprawled across my bed - sheets tangled around his hips, exposing those ridiculous abs, one muscular forearm thrown over his face. I bite my lip hard and escape.

Descending the stairs feels like a walk of shame despite being in my own damn house. The pleasant ache between my thighs serves as undeniable proof of how thoroughly Daniel addressed my... discomfort last night.

The kitchen becomes ground zero for my meltdown. All the panic I'd suppressed comes roaring back like a tsunami.

"Get a grip," I whisper to the empty room. "Adults do this all the time." My traitorous heart only pounds harder.

I wear grooves in the tile with my pacing. How did this happen? I swore no man but Ethan would ever touch me again. Yet here I am - not just letting Daniel kiss me, but welcoming him into my bed, my body.

Exhausted, I collapse onto a barstool. My restless foot taps a frantic rhythm against the floor. What's the protocol here? Do I make breakfast? Is this a one-time thing? Will he even want to stay?

My palm flattens against my pounding heart. I've never done casual before. Even before Ethan, I believed sex meant something.

"You don't need love," a sly voice murmurs in my head. "Just chemistry."

My vibrating phone interrupts the thought. The screen lights up with two words:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

My stomach drops when I see the sender: Ethan Blackwood. Shock curdles into rage.

The fucking audacity. Seven years of marriage without a single birthday wish. Countless cruel words. And now this? Today of all days? Hours after I've been with another man?

It's not fair to compare, but Daniel... God, Daniel wrecked me in the best possible way. The passion, the intensity - everything missing with Ethan. Positions I didn't know existed. Pleasure so sharp it bordered on pain.

The only time Ethan ever touched me like that was our first time - when he thought I was Isabella.

I always knew something was missing between us. Now I understand - it was desire. Because I wasn't her.

I shove the thought away violently. I can't stomach the idea that even in our most intimate moments, Ethan was holding back, wishing I was someone else.

Distraction comes in the form of more birthday texts - from Nathan, Amelia, Victoria, even Sebastian. I'll respond to Amelia later. The others can wait.

Why now? What do they want from me?

"Absolution," the voice whispers.

Forgiveness. Such a small word for such an impossible thing.

How can I forgive when they never did? How can I move on when they shattered me? Ethan was right - we both drank that night, but only I paid the price. Only I endured the names, the scorn, the isolation.

The anger builds like a storm. Hot tears threaten, and this time I let them come.

I'm so tired of being the strong one. That night cost me just as much as it cost Ethan. But no one saw my guilt. No one cared about my pain. It was always about Ethan and Isabella. Always him.

Why did I have to break to keep us together? Why was my suffering necessary for their happiness? They destroyed me, and no one even acknowledges it.

Something inside me snaps.

The scream that tears from my throat sounds feral. Glass shatters as I hurl a vase against the wall. Wood splinters when I kick a chair. Every broken thing mirrors the fractures in my soul.

I hate them. I hate Ethan most of all.

"Sophia."

Daniel stands in the doorway, shirtless and wide-eyed, taking in the destruction. I collapse to my knees, not caring about the glass biting into my skin. Physical pain is nothing compared to this.

"I gave him everything," I sob. "And he left me empty. How do I live like this, Daniel? I'm so tired of carrying this weight."

His arms wrap around me. "Let it go," he murmurs against my hair. "Just let it all out."

And I do. My nails score his skin as I pour years of anguish into his shoulder. He bears it silently, holding me together as I fall apart.

When the storm passes, he carries me upstairs like something precious. Exhaustion pulls me under, but for the first time in years, I feel... light.

However God judges my sins, I've paid my penance. The past can stay buried now. It's time to step into the light. Time to finally live.